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Post by amangsingh on Nov 10, 2010 21:39:36 GMT
hey just a random thought I was interested in what individuals planned to do in the future come out to their families? MOC's? run away etc??
I myself have no idea its going to be a dreaded time might have to run awy and start life up fresh
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Post by veer on Nov 11, 2010 11:14:01 GMT
I don`t know what will happen to me in the future but i definately won`t do anything i don`t want to please other people including my family. It means i will not get married to a female and have kids. I think it would not be fair to them and to myself and it would definately not make me happy. I`ve seen too many families falling apart because the man got fed up with living a dual life and lying to everyone. One of them ended up in psychiatry another one made an attempt to commit suicide. I think nothing can be worse than this. We don`t have the right to play with other people`s lives just as no one has the right to play with ours.
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Post by amangsingh on Nov 11, 2010 14:22:33 GMT
sometimes I think I would really like kids and stuff bring them up well and true. Give them the kind of support and understanding that I didnt have, but then its like how do i keep in contact with people who know am gay, how about the wife its alll sooo confusing like head f**k.....
I feel so unmotivated at times, life was all about working hard getting a good job then getting a family of my own and you know living the life having a loving family etc.....then coming to terms with my sexuality was just a blow it drew motivation out of me to do anything its like whats the point...
For myself coming to terms meant admitting to myself I was gay and coming to terms with the future implications that people around me would feel depending on the choices I would make... Ive told some friends surely a true friend would never let you get married but then family oh my such a big bambooozle....
I'm stone cold at times just laugh and smile with a big black hole in the back of my mind over whats written for me in the future, how my gay friends will drop off into MOC's, real marriages, stringing from man to man....just a feeling of losing direction
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Gurtej
Junior Member
Posts: 20
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Post by Gurtej on Nov 11, 2010 18:09:54 GMT
I feel the same way I had this whole 'straight' life planned out before and like u said it all gone And coming to terms with ur sexuality is hard for anyone to do and being Sikh it is really hard to even tell people not all of my family know And especially when family members talk about marriage and with my cousin getting married it hard to say I wonna get married to a guy!! I won't a life where I am happy and not living someone else's life coz I can't do it even if it means moving away and stuff I am willing to do that!!
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Post by jattlad on Nov 14, 2010 22:41:30 GMT
hi brothers
I m gettin scared about the future, all my sikh friends think i m straight, i dont know any gay sikhs i feel i m in a prison.
all my family hate gay people and are anti-gay
i think we sikhs who are gay should meet up somewhere, maybe a pub!!! :-)
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Post by awesomesikh on Nov 15, 2010 0:41:59 GMT
hi brothers I m gettin scared about the future, all my sikh friends think i m straight, i dont know any gay sikhs i feel i m in a prison. all my family hate gay people and are anti-gay i think we sikhs who are gay should meet up somewhere, maybe a pub!!! :-) If in london. Why dont you try coming to one of the Sarbat meet's there is one lined up next saturday 20th Nov. Click on the following link for more info www.sarbat.net/2010/10/20th-november-sarbat-social/The one after 20th november is in Birmingham on 11th Dec 2010
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noname
Junior Member
looking to meet bi women for a drink
Posts: 43
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Post by noname on Nov 16, 2010 22:04:13 GMT
since this is a web site with a sikh theme its only right to take inspiration from sikhism.
running away from home is never a good idea,
taking a mature, and diplomatic view is more productive.
there are many reasons as to why people find being homosexual attractive, convienient.
most people worry about money, and being independant-
e.g you can do what you want to under your own roof-
even dieing for your beliefs, and standing by your rights is true sikh fashion- to become shaheed for your rights.
maybe younger people who experience extreme stress and anger confussion, this is a good way to excersise control over your presures.
life is very dynamic-
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Post by veer on Nov 17, 2010 10:00:09 GMT
"there are many reasons as to why people find being homosexual attractive, convienient."
No one finds it attractive or convenient because it is not a question of choice. Period.
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Post by Jazzy on Nov 23, 2010 16:25:46 GMT
good question.
I do have a plan but not everything does go to plan. My parents do know about my sexuality and my partner who I do intend getting married to. Its not right to marry someone of the opposite sex just to make "everyone" happy...that persons life will be ruined!! This is something I always try to reinforce to my parent when they start talking about marriage.
Running away from home isnt a good idea because you will be running for the rest of your life!!
as noname said "taking a mature, and diplomatic view is more productive".
you are who you are. if you dont belive in yourself, who will believe in you?
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Post by amangsingh on Dec 2, 2010 20:33:34 GMT
good question. I do have a plan but not everything does go to plan. My parents do know about my sexuality and my partner who I do intend getting married to. Its not right to marry someone of the opposite sex just to make "everyone" happy...that persons life will be ruined!! This is something I always try to reinforce to my parent when they start talking about marriage. Running away from home isnt a good idea because you will be running for the rest of your life!! as noname said "taking a mature, and diplomatic view is more productive". you are who you are. if you dont belive in yourself, who will believe in you? Ya Allah lol...hmmm I think it depends on the type of parents Ive realised without sounding castist that jatt families are a lot more tribal and hostile to such gay goo stuff than non jatt families.... I dont think I could actually plan this all out well just going to be one of those things that time will tell
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Post by amangsingh on Dec 2, 2010 20:34:14 GMT
hi brothers I m gettin scared about the future, all my sikh friends think i m straight, i dont know any gay sikhs i feel i m in a prison. all my family hate gay people and are anti-gay i think we sikhs who are gay should meet up somewhere, maybe a pub!!! :-) Lol in a pub thu tha puka jatt ah lol
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Post by amangsingh on Dec 2, 2010 20:39:34 GMT
thats funny i never planned on being with female even when i was little...? Asian culture is VERY marriage orientated...the aunts grannies etc love to talk about this. I dont think theres been a time when a wedding conversation doesnt turn up at a womens gathering. Just thinking about the 3 bunches of relatives I had over at the weekend they each spoke about marriage either marriage videos, their sons wedding, my future wedding kids bla bla bla.... My mom doesnt bloody shush i make her food today and first thing she comes out with "rab thenu lumee umar deveh ik sohni ji bohtee deveh naleh tere bacheh hoveh" just another random typical line which means " God give u a long life with a beautiful wife and some kids." I just stay stum and think ladida lol
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Wolf
Junior Member
Posts: 36
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Post by Wolf on Dec 4, 2010 4:39:34 GMT
I'm not a Sikh, but I would love to start a relationship with a Sikh man
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Post by amangsingh on Dec 6, 2010 14:20:41 GMT
I'm not a Sikh, but I would love to start a relationship with a Sikh man we've established that lol
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Post by goramonasikh on Dec 8, 2010 6:20:32 GMT
My MOm just said she always knew same with my dad they never questioned it. i think once it all settled in when i was around 16 -17 it was pretty much a done topic and we kept it moving...
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